It’s funny because as it came to adapting to the lockdown guidelines and shielding advice, my life didn’t change all that much. I haven’t been as mobile due to my illness, however, it did impact to an extent. Due to my medication, I’m immunosuppressed, meaning shortly I’m in the “high risk” or “shielded” category. It meant tighter lockdown rules for both myself and my partner. He had to cut his contact with others as much as he could and when he could, so he lived through being almost in the high-risk group himself.
Adjusting to the pandemic – came to not adjusting lifestyle, but I suppose adjusting communication, community, relationships, patience and a lot more things that maybe we wouldn’t have considered would be tested so intensely. Being chronically ill during the pandemic wasn’t easy, it made appointments (and a one admission I needed) more difficult, it made getting necessities more challenging, it made getting medication just a little more tricky. Being extra vigilant had to happen also, about what came into the house and what needed to be cleaned extra thoroughly. But my partner, took on the massive undertaking of being responsible for our healths.
Do you know it’s funny, because ironically. Just before lockdown, we came back from holiday and mentally I was feeling motivated and uplifted, Then the lockdown happened, which was fine at first, but a few weeks in, it became harder to be motivated or to be productive. I felt lonely again, even though my partner is working from home. He’s here more often than he usually ever is, what a silly thing. To feel lonely when not alone? I began to feel a little Isolated and the more I seen people “break the rules”, the angrier I became. I’m really thankful we have a garden though – It made it possible for me to get fresh air and spend time “outside”. A lot of people aren’t as lucky, with the same shielding restrictions.
It’s been a hard time for us all, which I completely understand. But soon the world will begin to return to some sort of normality. I think this unique situation that the world has been put in, has given EVERYONE a little look and feel into what it is like to be limited or different. Whether its due to mobility and or mental health reasons (or anything else) show how hard it can be, when there feels as there is no requirement to do anything, because in reality what difference will it make, me trying?
In reality, it’s something that needs to be fleeting thought. Because it’s not about the big differences we make, it’s the people we impact that matter mainly. I go through highs and low when it comes to mental health, and I beat myself up because I know I know better. However, remembering the people that we have and the things that we can do regardless of our limitations or trials. To look at something with a different point of a view, only sometimes we need to take a step back to see that view – usually with the help of the people who deem us the honour of being loved.
Covid, in the grand scheme is just another challenge for us all. I hope that people have seen the best in humanity (like I have seen), I hope we realise that we are better together and embracing our uniquenesses and individual gifts will benefit us all. Then just in that same way must for the world and our own selves, we must show endurance, courage and acceptance.
Sam 🙂
